Saturday 6 December 2014

Top 10 Alternative Love Stories

Awwww.....sweeeeeet!

So many love stories available in film. Over the decades, tales of amour have invested in nearly every genre, forever ruling as the queen of story backbones. You must agree though that it is quite difficult , within such an overwhelming presence, to find romantic tales that sit alone; unique in this suffocating genre that crosses over to nearly every theme available.

Well, that's what I'm here for! However, the work was done for me already last year with Spike Jonze's surprisingly warming Her. Through one of the most unusual romances set to film, we were reminded of the core fundamentals for initially falling for someone, of how frequently others may never understand and of the pending sword of Damocles that threatens the sanctuary you've built for one another.

It received some mixed responses; unfairly so when considering the brave approach it was taking. So this got me thinking...what other alternative love stories deserve more recognition? Which tales of brewing romance need their gallantry and spirit upholding? Time for another Top Ten, this time on alternative love stories...

The criteria:
  • For a true alternative love story within a film, then the movie's core genre cannot be a "Romance". 
  • Better if love is not even the main thread of the story (a couple of exceptions have been made here, yet the films' core genre is so extreme it's forgiveable). This is why I haven't allowed Jonze's Her onto this list.
  • The ranking within this top ten is based on the growing strength of the romance, not necessarily the quality of the film. The lengths that the lovers go to within the tale is what drives them up and down this chart.
So, let see who are the king and queens of the courtship...


WARNING! Spoilers and heartbreak await!




10. Upstream Colour (2013)


Shane Carruth's second outing ripped up the rule book once more on most genres, yet most interestingly regarding love. The pair's symbiotic links to their pigs opened a sweet if twisted approach to unrequited love, both compelled to forgo their normal lives just to be together.

Score de l'amour: 4/10 
Like pigs in muck!





If scoring on quality, this would have rated higher. Fearing Cha Young-Goon will die of starvation, Park Il-Sun believes his 'special ability' could prevent her untimely death, falling for her in the process. Using your own psychosis to fix  that of another? Now that's love!

Score de l'amour: 5/10
Crazy about each other




8. Bonnie and Clyde (1967)


There's nothing like spills and thrills in a relationship. This canny pair take their relationship to the next level by starting a mutual hobby in bank robberies, sparking parodies and homages for decades, most notably Natural Born Killers.

Score de l'amour: 6/10 
Take that love to the bank!




7. Heathers (1988)


Dark humour and romance are a perfect match, just like Veronica and J.D. who take to covering their murders of fellow school students as cult suicide pacts. Yet, love is blind and tragedy will follow, as Veronica's last stab allows J.D. to go out in a blaze of glory.

Score de l'amour: 7/10
Too cool for school



6. Scott Pilgrim vs. the World (2010)


Competing with the ex is one thing...but seven?! And evil ones, at that! Luckily, Scott just happens to be totally badass at the game, taking on each opponent in a true war of romance, even dying and coming back to life to win the heart of Ramona Flowers.

Score de l'amour:  7/10
Ex-ceptional!



5. True Romance (1993)


Christian Slater appears for a second time on our list as Clarence, who will  do anything for his instant sweetheart Alabama. At the advise of the king of rock n roll himself, he'll take out anyone to protect his darling through their mission of love, in one cinema's greatest black romantic-comedies.

Score de l'amour: 7/10
Little less conversation...plenty of action




4. Angel-A (2005)


There are two love stories here. One beautiful message is to love yourself. Yet, beyond that, once André can except this, Angela makes a huge sacrifice - her angel wings burn to a cinder to allow her to stay with him, if preventing her return to Heaven. That's a mighty big gesture!

Score de l'amour: 8/10
A heavenly romance



3. Fight Club (1999)


No sleep, fights every weekend, credit hits zero, nearly kill yourself, explosions everywhere and build the biggest anarchistic empire ever. Just like a real relationship (well...except maybe the last part!). Unbeknownst until the end, our beloved narrator, in a roundabout way, does all of this for and because of the intriguing Marla Singer.

Score de l'amour: 9/10
Sleepless nights


2. Wall-E (2008)


After years of lonely garbage work, Wall-E meets and is transfixed by Eve. While in stasis, little "Trash-timus Prime" looks after her through thick-and-thin, even following her into space. Listening to his tin-man heart he reunites with her and returning the entirety of the rest of humankind to Earth in the process. Now that's a romantic gesture!

Score de l'amour: 9/10
To infatuation and beyond!





And the winner is...







1. Braindead (1992)


Okay, maybe Lionel didn't bring The Man to his knees through an underground network of political soldiers, or rescue the remnants of humanity from a psychotic space robot but the difference with this guy is his effort was totally intentional.

A real "mummy's boy", Lionel was a treated as butler, gardener, cook and cleaner by his mother, Vera, who's blind to his good heart and kind nature. This all gets shaken up when he meets pretty shop worker, Paquita, who's fortune is read, shrouded in mystery. She commits her intentions to Lionel, believing her prediction to mean that they will be romantically entangled, leading her to woo him.

It is kind of unfortunate that a zombie apocalypse awaits them. A date for the pair to the zoo leads to an accident, where the recently caught "rat monkey bites Lionel's mother in the ankle and the mysterious Sangaya virus spreads. As Vera becomes progressively ill, Lionel's efforts lean back towards caring for his mum, creating a rift between him and Paquita, which is understandable after Vera ate her dog! 

Lionel can't keep the virus at bay. Slowly, the townsfolk become zombified, leading to an almighty war with the walkers at his home. Such scenes have grounded Braindead as the goriest film of all time, yet it is within the last moments that this movie wins the top slot in this list. 

Following the brewing romance already at play, Lionel attempts to take out as many zombies as he can to rescue his true love with the only he knows how...with his impressive skills with a lawnmower. I can only assume Peter Jackson (yes...pre-middle earth, this film maker made some insane movies!) had always dreamed of taking out the undead with a Fly-mo.

However, the last moment is the sweetest and most breathtakingly romantic gesture of them all. Lionel gives up on caring for his vindictive mother and, after she ingests him through her stomach (she has seriously mutated at this point, I might add) destroys her internally, wiping her from his life and securing his place at Paquita's side. 

No matter how evil you mum is Lionel, that's some pretty serious efforts to win over the lady. The top slot is yours you sadistic mowing nut job, you!


Score de l'amour: 10/10

Undead into each other!


Just missed out:

Delicatessen
Submarine
Shaun Of The Dead
Stranger Than Fiction
Monsters
Blue Velvet



If you disagree, and have other suggestions, please post comments at the bottom of the post. Or, email me directly on topten@filmbore.co.uk.

And don't forget, you can tweet me @filmbore or post on my Facebook page here.